


I Don't Need Anyone But You

by AgentOfShip



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Academy Era, Adorable FitzSimmons (Agents of SHIELD), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Falling In Love, FitzSimmons Secret Santa, FitzSimmons Secret Santa 2018, Friends to Lovers, New Year's Eve, spanning several years
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-09-29 13:37:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17204360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentOfShip/pseuds/AgentOfShip
Summary: There's no one else Fitz would rather spend New Year's Eve with than Jemma. Jemma feels the same way. What if it meant more than friendship? A story about every New Year's Eve FitzSimmons spent together at the Academy, and how it impacted their relationship.





	I Don't Need Anyone But You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [itsavolcano](https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsavolcano/gifts).



> A very happy new year to my giftee @itsavolcano who requested a story about FitzSimmons falling in love in a SciOps/Academy era context :)  
> Hope you enjoy this little piece :)  
> And, as always, a huge thank you to @Libbyweasley for being such a fantastic beta and making this story much better for it :)

**New Year's Eve, 2003**

There was probably something Jemma didn't understand about parties. She'd heard from several older students at the Academy that The Boiler Room New Year's Eve parties were legendary. It had started out with a few students who couldn't go home for the holidays about thirty years ago. But over the years, it had grown bigger as more and more cadets actually decided to stay to party with their friends. And now, it was this huge thing with a light display and sound system that would have made every night club owner jealous. (Which was only logical in a place where the best engineers in the world were being trained to get even better.)

And it was a nice party, objectively speaking. The music was good, she'd had a fun chat with a few of her fellow cadets, and even danced for a while. She just felt somehow out of place and a little lonely, despite her friend Sally waiting at the bar while Jemma was supposed to go to the toilets. Instead, she was watching everybody having fun from her perch on the balcony, wondering how long she would have to wait after midnight to go to sleep.

She supposed her melancholic and gloomy mood were in good parts due to her early return to the Academy. Her parents had been invited to celebrate New Year's Eve with some friends in Paris. And since she didn't really keep contact with her friends from home, going back to the Academy after Christmas had seemed like the best option. But despite her decision to make the best of the evening, there was something missing, something she couldn't pinpoint that prevented her from really enjoying the party.

"Can I interest you in a disgusting non-alcoholic beer?"

Jemma straightened up and turned around immediately at the sound of the now very familiar Scottish accent. It was pretty dark around and she couldn't see him right away. Which, considering that he shouldn't be here, made her wonder if she'd hallucinated the words.

Until he came out of the shadows wearing a small grin on his face and holding two red plastic cups.

"Fitz!" she cried out, fighting her instinct to throw herself at him and hug him tight. She didn't want to get beer on both of them, and she wasn't sure that it was something they did anyway. In just a few months, Fitz had become the best friend she's ever had, but even though everyone said they were attached at the hip, he'd always been a bit shy, and she didn't want to crowd him with unwanted affection.

"You said you'd be back by the 3rd! Why are you here so soon?"

He came to stand next to her, hunching over the railing as he precariously balanced their drinks on it, affecting a casual attitude.

"Found some last minute offer yesterday, so I decided to pack my bags a little early and went to the airport this morning or last night, I don't know, I'm a little jet lagged"

"Fitz, I could have guessed the part about buying a last minute plane ticket!" she huffed. "I asked you why, not how."

His affected confidence faltered for a moment. He gave her a quick side glance before looking back at everyone partying downstairs.

"Fitz! Did you come back for me?"

He chuckled nervously as he rolled his eyes.

"Ugh, please! Don't flatter yourself Simmons. These parties are supposed to be legendary! That's all the older engineers have been talking about since the start of the year. I just had to come."

Jemma knew how uncomfortable big gatherings made him and it showed plainly on his face. A smile tugged at her lips.

"You came back for me."

She declared it this time. No question in her voice.

"Of course I came back for you, Simmons!" he said, sighing dramatically. "I know you don't have my social skills. I had to save you from terrible boredom and embarrassment."

She bumped his shoulder when he didn't turn around to look at her as he spoke.

"You really came back for me." Jemma insisted with an infinite amount of fondness in her voice.

"You're repeating yourself Simmons! Did you lose some of your neurons while I was gone?" he said with a mocking tone. "Wait! Did you manage to get beer with alcohol in it and how many did you get?"

He was trying to keep his tough-guy-no-big-deal attitude but she could see his lips twitching and the not so confident look in his eyes.

Oh, shyness be damned, he was adorable and she was overjoyed to see him. She was going to hug him and there was nothing he could do to stop it. She grabbed his shoulders to make him turn around fully and, after hesitating for a few seconds, she threw her arms around his neck. Thankfully, he almost immediately hugged her back, his hands awkwardly hovering over her before settling around her waist and holding on tight. She'd never hugged him before and, even though he was clearly as lean as he looked, he felt nicely solid. And warm. And he smelt just as nice as ever. Overall, it was a lovely hug, but more than that, it was simply his presence that made her feel so much better than she was a minute ago.

"Downplay it as much as you want ..." she started, speaking in his ear so he could hear her over the increasingly pounding music. "... but this is, without a doubt, the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me."

"Well, I couldn't leave you all alone with Sally Weber and her bad influence. Who knows what kind of bad girl shenanigans she might get you into ..."

"Fitz!" she cried out, disentangling herself from him and glaring at him and his mocking smirk. "I only said it once. Can't you let it go?"

"Uuuuh ... no!"

She swatted his chest half-heartedly.

"I'm still happy you're here. I can't believe you bought a last minute ticket from Glasgow, it must have cost you a fortune!"

"Ah no that's-that's alright" he replied, fidgeting with his hands and smiling a little shyly. "Got a little money from that patent I sold before coming to the Academy."

"And you decided to spend it on a ticket to come ring in the New Year with me?"

At this rate, her jaw was going to hurt from how much she was smiling.

Fitz shrugged as he answered.

"What else was I gonna use it for?"

"Aww Fitz!"

Jemma had known for some time that there was the tenderest heart behind this grumpy façade but it still warmed her heart every time he proved it to her. She couldn't resist and took a step forward to place a kiss on his cheek.

"Got you!"

A white flash came along with Sally Weber's clearly tipsy voice.

"Oi! What the-" Fitz cried out as Jemma backed away, her cheeks heating up like she'd been caught doing something far less innocent than kissing her best friend on the cheek.

"Awww look! You're so cute!" Sally said as she planted her phone just right in front of their faces.

Jemma couldn't see much with the flash having probably burned her retina. But Fitz's look of surprise was indeed kind of cute. And he was smiling as he looked at her sideways.

"Sally, you've had too much to drink, you should"

"I'm sending it to you," Sally interrupted, having apparently not planned on letting either Fitz or Jemma talk. "You can use it as your screensaver or, you know, show it to your grandkids later, tell them that was the beginning of it all!"

"What?" Fitz squeaked. "What do you mean? That's ..."

"... ridiculous!" Jemma picked up after him. "We've known each other for months and..."

"... we already have a picture Jemma took during our first late night study session."

"So if one picture could represent the beginning of our friendship, that would be it!" Jemma finished, turning around towards Fitz for confirmation. He gave her a nod and a firm smile and they both turned back to Sally who, for some reason, had a wide grin on her face.

"Of course," she simply replied, and walked away as quickly as she'd arrived, like the nonsense spouting tornado that she was.

After a slightly confused moment of silence, Jemma turned back to Fitz, only to see him make an exaggerated grimace as he drank his beer. She chuckled before taking his plastic cup from him and putting it back on the railing.

"Come on I'll get us something nice to drink."

"What? Like soda?" he said with a pout.

"No, something really nice!"

"What? How?"

"I have my ways ..." Jemma said, looping her arm in his and pulling him towards the bar. Jenny, the bartender for the night, owed her one for helping her put out the fire she set in her room for using a malfunctioning electric kettle.

Fitz gave her a suspicious look but still followed.

"Good thing I came back early! Who knows what you might have gotten yourself into?" he mumbled.

"Only terrible boredom and embarrassment, of course!"

 

**New Year's Eve, 2004**

"Shouldn't we go back now?"

"Not yet, we still have time!" Jemma replied as she hugged herself, rubbing her arms vigorously.

Fitz looked at his watch. It said 23:45. A wide smile split his face in two. Despite the cold and the fact it would take them five whole minutes to get back from the roof of her dorm to the Boiler Room, she'd rather stay with him, watching the stars and drinking tea.

"It's all so loud and hot back there. It's nicer here with you," she said with a happy sigh.

"Because I'm cold and quiet?" he replied teasingly.

She burst out laughing and it only made him smile wider. She had that lovely sounding laugh that made her look even prettier than she usually was. And especially now when her cheeks were tinted pink with cold, she looked positively radiant. He would try out every joke, every stupid pun in the world just to make her laugh again. Recently, he realized that very few things made him feel happier than to make his best friend happy. And it made him feel all fuzzy inside to know that simply being here with him put such a big smile on her face.

"Because you only speak to say interesting things!" she corrected as she nudged his shoulder teasingly. "And you're actually quite warm," she added, sliding a little closer to him on their little bench.

Fitz chuckled as she looked up at him with raised eyebrows. He took the hint and put his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close and vigorously rubbing her arm up and down. Jemma turned her face up and gave him a soft satisfied smile. She was so close that he could almost taste the jasmine of her tea in the puff of air that lingered in the cold night as she breathed out.

"Yes, it's definitely nicer here," she sighed contentedly.  
After a few seconds, she let her head fall on his shoulder, the pompon of her beanie tickling his cheek. But as brief as the moment was, it still made his heart leap in his chest. Because, and it wasn't the first time, he'd just had the sudden desire to kiss her. It's happened at least three times in the past month. Like that time she opened the door for him when she was just out of bed, her hair a mess, her skin all freckly and with that pouty sleepy smile that made him want to take her in his arms, bring her back to bed and spend the rest of the day kissing as they huddled under that enormous blanket of hers. Or when she suggested that they should both come back for New Year's Eve so they could celebrate together and make it their tradition. That time, he was pretty sure it was just out of fondness and pure happiness to have someone in his life who cared for him that much. But the other times ...

He supposed it was about him being seventeen and Jemma being a very pretty girl. Quite possibly the most beautiful girl he's ever met, and for sure the prettiest at the Academy. But it was strange because Moira was pretty as well, and she made it clear that she wouldn't be opposed to kissing him. But he'd never felt the desire to pursue the idea despite, again, being a seventeen years old boy. But Jemma wasn't just any girl. She was special and his favorite person in the world. It only made sense that his affection for her expressed itself in different ways. It didn't have to mean anything else. It just meant that he loved her very much, and wanted to take her in his arms, and missed her when they were apart, even for a day. So if he wanted to know the taste and touch of her lips on top of that, it just meant that--

"Owwww" Fitz cried out as a flash of white light brought him back to the moment. Jemma had just taken another one of those bloody selfies of them both.

"Aww! That's a good one!" Jemma exclaimed happily. "You look so deep in thought though. Did I interrupt something?" she asked, half serious, half teasing.

Yeah, like he was going to tell her.

"I'd look at your bloody picture Simmons, but I'm blind now!"

"Of course, you're not!" she said, rolling her eyes. Or well, he supposed she was rolling her eyes, because he couldn't see it, just hear it in the tone of her voice.

"Now you are!" she added, then turned back to him and pulled his beanie down until it was covering his whole face.

"Ugh, Simmons! You're the worst!" he cried out and she burst out laughing. His grumpiness didn't usually work on her because she found it --her words, not his-- funny and cute.

"Nah! You love me," she replied, her voice still laced with laughter.

He was about to reply that he really didn't but she put her hands on his shoulders, forcing him to face her, and pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose through the wool of his stupid beanie. The softness of the gesture reduced him to silence. She was wrong. He didn't just love her, he was completely in love with her.

"Fitz? Are you giving me the silent treatment?" she asked when it seemed like he was getting lost in thoughts again.

"No. Just plotting my revenge."

She huffed.

"Well, plot as you walk! We better get moving if we want to be back there for the countdown."

Putting his beanie back in place, she stood up and took his hand. She started walking towards the door, not letting go of his hand as she pulled him in her wake. She looked back at him with a bright smile.

And now she was probably going to hug him and give him a friendly kiss on the cheek at midnight, just like she did the previous year. And that should be enough because she was a wonderful friend and any proof of her affection he cherished like the most precious gift. But he already knew that, at this precise moment, all he was going to think about was how easy it would be to turn his head just a little bit and have her lips on his for even just a second.  
He knew that it should be enough to have someone who cared for him so much and chose to stay with him rather than staying home with her family a little longer. He knew that what they had, their beautiful friendship, was something special that so many people dreamed of having. But tonight, for a few minutes, he knew he would still be jealous of that wonderful moment of closeness and intimacy all those couples would share.

 

**Two days before Christmas, 2005**

"It already sucks that we're not going to be together this year but having to go through another flight on my own, that's just--" Fitz mumbled under his breath as they made their way through the Christmas crowd of Heathrow airport.

"Oh, Fitz!" Jemma sighed as she pulled him to the side to stop him from just barreling through like a bulldozer. "We both agreed that we should spend as much time as possible with our parents while we could. Who knows when we'll see them again? We don’t even know where we’ll be stationed once we graduate in May."

She said the words in that soft low voice that usually worked well to get him out of one of his grumpy episodes. But his bad mood wouldn't go away quite so easily this time.

"But it's our tradition!" Fitz insisted. He knew he sounded childish but he was really seriously bummed out not to spend New Year's Eve with Jemma. Especially when she looked at him so fondly despite his attitude.

"Fitz, we've only been doing that for two years!"

"Oh because there's rules about traditions now?" he mumbled. "Do we have to do something a certain amount of times before it becomes a tradition?"

"No, Fitz. Of course not," she quickly replied as she put her hands on his shoulders. "You're right, it's a tradition. We'll party extra hard next year, alright?"

"You mean with actual beer?"

"With actual beer and fancy cocktails!" she replied, a smile forming on her face as she saw the corners of his lips ticking up.

"Promise?"

"Promise!"

"I'll miss you," he finally let out in a whisper before pulling her into a hug. She immediately held him tight in return, burying her face in the crook of his neck for a moment.

"I'll miss you too," she said as she pulled back, planting a kiss on his cheek.

Sometimes, he almost managed to convince himself that Jemma was his best friend and nothing more, that what he felt for her was just a silly crush, and that it would go away with time. But then she'd look at him with those bright eyes and that soft smile she never directed at someone else, and he started believing that she loved him back. It made him want to ask her to be marry him and be the mother of his children right away.

Or maybe just kiss her for starters. A lot. Which would be a really good way to start on the kids anyway. But that was stupid because she obviously didn't feel the same. She would have said so if she did. And, okay, maybe he didn't say anything either but still, how could she anyway? He was nothing like the men she seemed to like. He certainly was nothing like Milton, which he always thought was a good thing, but now ... In retrospect, maybe he should have said something right away when he realized his feelings, in the heat of the moment. She was in an awfully good mood and all affectionate, maybe she could have seen it too. Or, maybe, she would have kissed him at midnight, and it would have been magical, and she would have realized her love for him all of a sudden.

"Fitz?"

"What?" he blurted out, realizing he must have been lost in thoughts longer than was acceptable.

"This is very sweet, but you're going to have to let me go so I can go and take my train while you board your next flight."

He still had his arms loosely wound around her waist, but it didn't seem to really bother her. Her head was tilted to the side and she had an amused smile.

"Are you alright?" she asked. "You look a bit … flushed."

"No it's hum-I'm fine, just tired I guess," he replied, feeling his cheeks heat up even more.

"Alright …" she said before pressing one last kiss to his other cheek. "Fitz?"

"Yeah?"

"Let me go?"

"Oh yeah ... sure. Sorry!"

Fitz finally stepped back, smoothing inexistant wrinkles on her coat before reluctantly taking his hands off her. She smiled fondly once more before ruffling his curls.

And then, there were moments like these when Fitz felt like she loved him dearly. Just not like he did her, and more like a cute cuddly younger sibling. When he let his treacherous mind wander, he could already imagine waking her up with kisses on Sundays, before eating breakfast in bed together. Whereas Jemma probably only imagined them having pyjama parties with cookies and Dr Who marathons. Both scenarios sounded nice actually, but if he had to choose ...

 

**The day before New Year's Eve, 2005**

"Honestly, Fitz, I don't understand why you don't want to wear it!" Jemma said to the small version of her best friend on her computer screen.

He huffed as he rolled his chair back, extending his arms to give her a full view of the disaster. His words, not hers. Jemma shrugged. He looked kind of cute like that, in her opinion.

"I look bloody stupid, Jemma!" he cried out.

"Fitz!" she admonished. "Have a little respect! Do you know how long it takes to knit a jumper?"

"No. Do you?"

He grinned.

"Well, no ... But it doesn't matter. It's a very long time, that's the point."

"But what with the L? It's not like I need a sweater to remember my initials! And no one calls me Leo but her anyway, I'm going to look ridiculous!"

"No more than usual!" she teased.

He tried to glare at her, squinting his eyes as he crossed his arms over his chest. But it was hard to take him seriously when he looked this adorable, with his festive jumper and hair extra curly.

"I thought you were my friend, Jemma!" he let out as he fell back in his chair.

"Oh, don't be so dramatic, Fitz! Just wear the thing until the end of the holidays and then, I'll be happy to steal it from you."

"Don't you have enough of those already?" he said, lifting an amused eyebrow.

She did love to steal his jumpers and cardigans. They were just big enough to be extra comfy, and always smelled nice, like soap and that flower scented product Fitz insisted he didn't use in his hair. She didn't keep count anymore of all the times she fell asleep wearing one of them.

"You know I don't!" she grinned.

"Alright then, I suppose that's an acceptable-"

Fitz was interrupted by a voice coming from somewhere in Fitz's house, too muffled for Jemma to hear through Skype.

"Ah I'm gonna have to hang up now. Dinner's ready."

"Oh!"

Jemma looked up towards the top right corner of her laptop. It was almost seven thirty already and there was still daylight outside when they started talking. Time seemed to fly even faster than usual when she was with him these days.

"Alright then. Can we Skype again sometime tomorrow?"

"Of course, it's not like I have any big plans for New Year's Eve."

He smiled as he said the words but it didn't completely reach his eyes.

"I swear we're going to make up for it next year, Fitz," she said, feeling awfully guilty even though they both agreed to it months ago.

"I know, Jemma." He shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Don't mind me being my usual grumpy self and enjoy your time at home, Jem."

"You too, Fitz. See you tomorrow."

"See you!" he replied, waving his left hand as the other moved to the keyboard to finish the call.

Instead of closing itself though, the window froze on the last image of his smiling face.

She sighed.

When he wouldn't let go of her at the airport, she thought he was just his -admittedly adorable- dramatic self. But it had only been a week since that day, and she missed him with a fierceness that surprised her. Talking over Skype for hours wasn't the same as having him close to her for real. Watching all the terrible made for TV Christmas movie wasn't the same when she couldn't cuddle up to him, and pretend he was the one eating most of the Maltesers anyway, to feel better about herself. She missed his physical presence as much as she missed his brilliant spirit.

And now, she was feeling guilty because she already spent most of her time with Fitz and it wasn't fair to her parents to want to be elsewhere at the moment, especially since they planned everything so thoughtfully for her stay.

She sighed again.

"Everything alright?"

The sound of her mother's voice startled her out of her slight daze and she looked up towards the half open door of her bedroom.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. I just finished skyping with Fitz."

"Are you sure? You look a little-I don't know ... melancholic. Boy trouble, maybe?"

"What? No!" Jemma said, her brows furrowing in confusion. "Fitz is the only boy in my life that I care about and he's never been nothing less than absolutely lovely."

Evelyn Simmons took a few steps in and sat next to her daughter on the bed.

"Maybe that's the problem," she said with a knowing smile. Which Jemma found extremely annoying. Mostly because she had no idea what her mother was so smugly smiling about. And she hated not knowing something, especially when it was about herself.

"But what problem mom? I just told you Fitz was perfectly sweet. What are you--"

"Never mind, sweetheart. I must be getting old- Oh dear! Is that him on your screen?" Evelyn interrupted herself to point towards where Fitz's face was now smiling at them both. Jemma nodded as an equally big smile grew on her face. "He really looks like a man now. Can't believe it's the same boy we met six months ago!"

Fitz had spent two weeks at the Simmons' during the previous summer. And once they got past the shy, awkward phase that was typical of Fitz, everyone had adored him. Which hadn't surprised Jemma in the least. Fitz was wonderful and having had a complicated childhood, he marvelled at things Jemma took for granted. He sincerely laughed at all of Jemma's dad terrible jokes and the two of them ate all the sweet and greasy food his wife and daughter wouldn't even touch. As for her mum, well, she thought he was just too cute with his big blue eyes and curly hair.

"Yeah, he had a late growth spurt," Jemma replied. "Got a few inches on me now, he's very smug about it."

The two women laughed about it but then Evelyn nodded at the screen again. "But look at that face too, such a lovely dreamy smile!"

Jemma raised her eyebrows.

"Mum ... I think he's too young for you, you know" she declared flatly. She couldn't keep a straight face for long though, as her mum let out a scandalized gasp. "Don't worry, I won't tell dad but you shouldn't pursue it, it's just not meant to-- Ooww!"

Jemma pretended to rub her shoulder after Evelyn nudged it in fact quite gently.

"So a grown woman cannot notice how a lovely boy is turning into a very handsome man without being accused of having ulterior motives, uh? How very small minded of you my genius daughter," Evelyn teased.

Jemma rolled her eyes and nudged her mother back.

"Well, dinner will be ready in a bit, can you come down soon?" Evelyn asked as she stood up and walked to the door.

"Sure, I'll be down in a minute."

"And do give my, platonic and motherly love to Fitz next time you talk to him!"

"Will do!" Jemma said with a small chuckle before her mother left the room for good.

Jemma looked back at the screen. It was true that Fitz had a very aesthetically pleasing face. He was very symmetrical with lovely proportions and those big blue eyes that were so expressive and that, sometimes, seemed to catch the light in an almost unnatural way. His latest growth spurt had also made him lose the last of his baby fat and the statuesque structure of his face stand out.

And her mum was right of course, he did have a lovely smile. It was contagious to the point she couldn't stop herself from smiling at him at the moment, even though he was just a picture on her computer screen. He could be quite grumpy on a daily basis, but whenever he smiled, she couldn't remain annoyed or mad at him. Which also made him the best at lifting her up when she was feeling a little down.

She sighed again.

It really made no sense to miss him so much when she'd just talked to him and she would be seeing him in a few days, just after New Year's Day. Well, she supposed she must be giving their little tradition more importance than she thought at first.

Jemma stretched her sore back and legs, closed her laptop and then stood up to go down for dinner. Surely, it was nothing a lovely healthy home cooked dinner couldn't fix.

-0-0-0-

She couldn't believe she lost at Scrabble. Twice. She never lost at Scrabble. To anyone. She never lost at any board game to anyone, even Fitz.

Ugh Fitz! That was all his fault. However very ordinary it was, Jemma has always loved a night of board games by the fireplace. It usually kept whatever was troubling her at bay. But instead, Fitz had been on her mind all evening, making her miss extremely obvious words and make stupid choices.

She didn't understand why she felt that way. They'd been apart much longer every summer since they started at the Academy. And surely, she missed him a lot more every time and was overjoyed to see him again at the end of the holidays, but it never hindered her capability to enjoy what little time she had with her family. There must have been something she was missing, but couldn't understand what.

She turned off the lights and turned on the one on her bed side table instead, before settling in bed.

She considered calling Fitz, it wasn't too late yet, but what was she supposed to tell him? "I miss you an unusual amount, please give me an explanation."

No, that was ridiculous.

She still picked up her phone though, grinning at her screensaver, a picture of Fitz and her taken during their first Boiler Room New Year's Eve party. They literally looked like deer in headlights, with the flash of Sally's phone in full force, but Jemma loved that picture nonetheless. Fitz had an adorable smile and his eyes were darting to the side, looking at her. His expression was so ... she couldn't find the words but, somehow, it looked like what she was feeling at the moment.

Hum.

Unlocking her phone, she opened her picture folder and smiled. About half of it were pictures of either Fitz or Fitz and her together. He looked kind of grumpy in most pictures she'd taken of him alone --he didn't like being photographed very much-- but there was also the occasional grimace. Those, she liked a lot. It might be a little childish but he had such an expressive face that it never failed to cheer her up.

And then, there were the pictures of them together. There was the occasional picture taken by a friend but most of those were selfies and those were the ones she liked best. She always thought that was the best way to capture who he really was, the softer, more vulnerable side of him he seemed to only let out when they were alone.

She swiped through her galery and stopped at the one she'd taken right after their last final at the end of their first year. They looked exhausted, but happy and relaxed. And Fitz was looking at her again. Her smiled softened.

Then there was the one taken at Thanksgiving when they had the whole common room of their dorm to themselves. Fitz was looking at her like she'd just invented cold fusion, and her chest filled with even more warmth just looking at the picture. He was such a sweet boy and sometimes she wondered what she had done to deserve someone like him in her life.

A moment later, the picture taken last new year's Eve appeared on screen and Jemma's heart skipped a beat. She hadn't looked at it since it's been taken, and even then, they had to run to the Boiler Room immediately after and had taken a lot of other pictures. But now that she was looking at it more closely, she couldn't miss Fitz's expression. He was looking at her again but there was something more in his eyes, something that went beyond his usual fondness. If she didn't know any better, she'd say it was … love. Not just the friendly kind of love that she knew had always been there, but romantic love.

No. No, no, no, no, no. That just wasn't possible. She was probably imagining it. It was only because she was missing him so badly these days, and the flash was what made his eyes shine even brighter than usual.

Jemma straightened up in bed, resting her back against the wall. She started swiping through her pictures, quickly going over the ones from the party and those from the first snow at the Academy, until she found another one of them both. She didn't even remember taking that one but Fitz was doing it again, he was looking at her with so much affection it left her breathless. She continued swiping and found another, and then another, until she came upon the pictures taken the previous summer, when Fitz spent two weeks in Sheffield.

These were taken from farther away, probably by her mum. Fitz and her had spent almost all afternoon lying in the grass in the garden, just enjoying the warm weather. In almost all of them, Fitz was looking at her like she was the sun itself. They'd had only meaningless conversations all day, so why would he look at her like that? Was it really possible that he was in fact … in love with her?

Oh God! She should never have looked at those picture! She thought they would give her answers and maybe explain why she was feeling so gloomy, and now she just had more questions. If Fitz really had romantic feelings for her, why didn't he say anything? And why didn't she notice? They were best friends and spent all their time together, it just--

Oh!" Jemma said out loud when, in her frantic swiping back and forth, she found another picture from Sheffield. She zoomed in a bit on their faces to make sure of what she thought she saw.

"Oh!"

She remembered that moment. Fitz has just told her that stupid joke about eggs and kiwis. It didn't even make any sense and it wasn't really funny. So why was she smiling so wide and why did she look at him like HE was the one who'd just invented cold fusion?

Oh.

No, it couldn't be so simple. She was a certified genius. Missing all the signs that Fitz was in love with her was one thing, but missing the signs that SHE was in love with him? That was preposterous. Of course, Fitz had always been wonderful. He was the most interesting person she knew and he was so kind to her and always knew how to cheer her up. And yes, he had a very pleasant face that made her smile just thinking about it, AND she missed him even they'd only been apart for a few days, but that didn't necessarily have to mean--

Wait. Was that what her mom was implying earlier with all the boy trouble nonsense? Ugh. Considering the pictures and the … everything really, she supposed from her mum's point of view, it made sense.

So what now? Was it too late to call him again? And to ask what this time? "I might have solved the mystery of why I was missing you on my own. Evidence points to us being in love with each other, care to check my data?"

No. This felt like something she should do face to face. However little she knew about love, it felt like being in the presence of a person would probably help sort out one's feeling for said person.

She sighed for the hundredth time that day. Months of spending every waking moment together and it had to happen now that she wouldn't see him for another four days. What was she going to do?

-0-0-0-

"What are you doing? I thought you already bought your plane ticket months ago!"

"God! Mum! Can't you knock?"

"You're in the living room dear," Evelyn Simmons replied, her voice sounding at the same time amused and a little worried.

"Oh. Right. Sorry."

Saying that Jemma hadn't slept well was quite the understatement. After spending another hour looking at every picture of Fitz, alone or with her, and then at all the texts they'd exchanged for the past years, she'd come to the very unhelpful conclusion that she loved him more than anything and never really wanted to be without him. But that was nothing new and she still didn't know HOW she loved him. She still fell asleep at some point, though. She'd hoped that maybe her dreams would bring her some answers, or maybe just more data to consider, but no. Instead she had the weirdest dreams about eggs, kiwis, monkeys and treacherous Scrabble tiles.

And that was why she ended up on her computer, looking up plane tickets before the sun was even up.

"And of course, I bought my plane ticket back to the Academy in Septem-"

"Wait!" Evelyn cut her off. "Why are you looking up tickets for Glasgow? For this afternoon? Oh no, is there something wrong with Fitz?"

She sat very close to her daughter, forcing her to look up at her with the worry in her voice.

"No, don't worry mom, Fitz is perfectly fine!"

"Then why are you-"

"I have to ask him something!"

The worry on Evelyn's face was replaced with confusion.

"You know you could just call or text or Skype or-"

"Can't ask him that on the phone," Jemma mumbled under her breath as she looked away from her mother's inquisitive gaze.

"Oh! Oh, this is exciting!" Evelyn said, her voice going all high and squeaky. "Jemma dear, were you planning to fly to Glasgow last minute and declare your love for your best friend?"

"Whaaaat?" Jemma cried out, her voice way too high pitched to be believable. "No, don't be ridiculous! I told you I just have to ask him something!"

"Ask him if he loves you back?"

"No! I-I … I don't know. Maybe. I just need-"

"Oh Jemma!"

Her mom practically squealed. She'd been watching too many Hallmark movies on telly again.

"Calm down mum, it's just a stupid impulse. I've been missing him a lot and I've been looking at pictures and I thought a good explanation for it could be that-"

"You love him?"

"Well, that I already knew, mum!"

"Jemma Simmons, don't be cheeky, you know what I mean!"

Her mom leveled her with a glare that brooked no argument. It really was unfair of her to go so easily from being all gooey to terribly intimidating.

"Of course I know, and yes, that was my explanation. But it doesn't matter anyway, because tickets are ridiculously expensive and I'm celebrating with you and … Mom, what are you doing?" Jemma asked, confused as Evelyn turned the laptop towards herself and started typing and clicking.

"Booking that ticket before the price goes up!" she replied matter of factly.

"What? No no no, it's too expensive and it's not reasonable." Jemma admonished, still feeling her heart start to hammer in her chest. Whether it was in excitement or fear, she couldn't tell.

"Jemma you've been acting more like an adult than most people I know, since you were ten. I've been waiting for you to do something like that for ages. I mean, taking a last minute flight to declare your love for your best friend? Does it get more exciting than that?"

Evelyn looked up to flash her a wide grin that made her look ten years younger, and went right back to what she was typing.

"But-but mum …"

"Jemma love, less looking at me like a fish out of water and more getting me my credit card. My handbag is on the coffee table over there."

Her tone was soft and playful and yet Jemma felt like she didn't have any choice but to stand up and do exactly as she was told.

"Thank you dear. I'm booking the 5 PM flight. With any luck, you can get to his place before he leaves the house to celebrate or whatever he was planning to do."

Jemma focused on the sounds of clicking and typing as her mom kept proceeding with every step of the booking. Was she really going to do that? Take a plane to Glasgow, catch a cab to Fitz's house and then what? Just tell him how she thought she felt? Ask him about his own feelings first? Maybe she had time to prepare a speech during her flight.

"Jemma? Everything alright?"

Evelyn Simmons had stopped typing and was looking at her now with a sympathetic smile. Jemma was tempted to just smile and act like she had everything under control, like she always did. But it was just too much this time.

"This is really scary, mum"

"Oh. Come here," she said, pulling Jemma close until her arm was around her daughter's shoulder and their heads rested against each other.

"I know it is, but I'm so proud of you, love." She pressed a kiss to her temple. "And I've seen the pictures. Taken a few of them myself. I wouldn't be too worried."

Jemma sighed as she hugged her mum a little tighter. She had a lot to do to get ready, but she could steal another few minutes of serenity before she possibly turned her own life upside down.

-0-0-0-

When the cab finally stopped in Fitz's street, Jemma felt more than a little defeated. Everything had been fine until she boarded the plane, and then it's all gone to hell. It had taken an hour to take off because the airport was so busy, then another one before the passengers could leave the plane because Glasgow's airport was even worse apparently. By the time Jemma finally managed to get through the crowd of travellers and caught a cab, it was past 10:30. Fitz had probably left the house a long time ago and, on top of that, he was probably mad or sad, or both, that they didn't get to Skype earlier this evening.

She had considered going right back to Sheffield but she was so close now. She could always chicken out and tell him she just wanted to spend New Year's Eve with her friend. After all, he'd done it for her when they'd only known each other for a few months.

And, again, he probably wasn't home so she would most likely be frozen outside his door by the time he came back. So, at least, that solved the problem of what she was supposed to tell him.

Shaking her head, Jemma paid for the cab ride, got out, grabbed her suitcase, and walked the last few meters towards the quaint little house. It was half hidden behind trees and flower bushes, even at this time of the year. As she entered the walkway leading to the door, Jemma tried to find courage in the fond memories of the time she spent there the previous summer, right after their time together in Sheffield and just before going back to the Academy. Fitz's mum was incredibly sweet and welcoming, and Fitz had been an absolute delight the whole time. Cooking breakfast every morning and looping his arm in hers as he led through the streets of Glasgow to show her his favorite spots.

"Jemma?"

She recognized his voice of course, but couldn't see him anywhere.

"Up here!"

She looked up and there he was, sitting on the edge of his bedroom window, his big woolly beanie and equally big scarf hiding half of his face, and looking down at her in utter confusion.

"Oh hi Fitz!" she said cheerfully, trying to keep the nerves out of her voice.

"Hi, Fitz?!" he repeated, and she flashed him an embarrassed smile. "What are you doing here Jemma?"

"Didn't think you'd be home. Why aren't you out celebrating?"

"Mum got sick, caught the flu, I'm staying home to take care of her, but I have a front row seat for the fireworks at least," he said, shrugging before narrowing his eyes once more. "Seriously, why are you here?"

"Fitz, it's freezing out here. Can I come in so I can, you know, freeze to death up there with you instead?"

She knew she was avoiding the subject for now. But despite the very Shakespearean setting that seemed quite fitting to the situation, she didn't want the whole neighborhood to witness that scene. Especially if Romeo ended up telling Juliet she'd completely mistaken the signs and he'd prefer if they remained friends.

"Of course. Door's open, just be quiet, I think mum's sleeping."

When Jemma made it upstairs, his door was open and he was waiting for her on the windowsill with a big fluffy blanket. He tilted his head in invitation and she came to sit next to him. He extended the blanket over her shoulders and she only hesitated a second before huddling closer, taking his arm and resting her head on his shoulder. He didn't press her for more information immediately, and instead, pressed a kiss to her temple before resting his head on top of hers.

And that's when she knew. She couldn't say for sure how he felt, she couldn't read his mind after all. But she knew she was in love with him. Despite being in a house she'd only spent a week in, she felt more at home here than she'd been in the past ten days. Because that was what Fitz had become to her. Her home. Being close to him gave her an inexplicable sense of thrill and filled her with a warmth that had nothing to do with the blanket.  
"Jemma?" he asked after a moment, his voice soft, barely more than a whisper, as if not to disturb the peacefulness of the scene.

"Mhmm?"

"Why are you are?"

"Well, I bought a last minute ticket, went to the airport, boarded the plane, then I--"

"I asked you why, not how!" he cut her off.

She smiled softly as she looked up at him.

"You came for me!"

She rolled her eyes exaggeratedly.

"Don't flatter yourself Fitz, Glasgow is renown the world over for its New Year's Eve fireworks display!"

She could feel him smile more than she saw him.

"You came for me!" he repeated.

"Of course I did. I knew you'd be lost and bored to death without me."

"Yeah, about that you're right," he said, looking down at her with that expression again. It wasn't the flash on that photograph, she thought. His eyes did seem to shine brighter when he was looking at her. His chest started to go up and down faster as she studied his beautiful face for even more signs. His lips pulled up into a shy smile as he pulled his free hand from under the blanket to take one of hers and thread their fingers together. Her breathing seemed to synchronize with his then, and she had to take a deep breath before she started talking again.

"I had picture I wanted to show you."

He looked a little confused. Probably not what he expected her to say at this exact moment.

"You could have sent them."

"No, I had to show you in person. See …" she trailed off as she fished for her phone with her free hand. It wasn't exactly practical going through the files on her phone with only one hand but she really was loathe to take her other hand off his. "I just-I noticed that sometimes you look at me … differently." She studied his face again as he looked at the pictures on her phone. He didn't really look surprised, and his lips pulled into a small smile instead. "Like you're … in love," she finally added.

It took him only half a second to nod as his smile widened.

"Yeah, looks like it!"

Her heart skipped a beat at the lower tone of his voice. She bit her lip not to smile too wide before turning slightly to look into his eyes again.

"And what do I look like right now?" she asked with a shaky voice.

"Mmhm I don't know, I'd say … very cold!"

"Ugh Fitz!" she cried out before freeing her hands and pulling on his beanie to cover his face.

She could hear him chuckle underneath. He was ridiculous and exasperating, but he was just too bloody adorable and he was hers. She grabbed his face with both her hands and pressed a kiss to his lips through the fabric. His laughter died down.

"Jemma?"

"Do you want to maybe take the beanie off now?"

He hurried to take it off completely. His hair was a complete mess, his curls standing at odd angles, and his eyes seemed even bigger than usual as they kept travelling from her eyes to her lips. She raised her eyebrows at him as she tilted her head to the side in invitation. She'd come all this way and showed him the pictures, surely he could be the one to take that last step.

Finally, he palmed her cheek delicately and moved closer, cautiously, until his mouth was on hers, with no barrier between them this time. His lips were soft and warm as they moved against hers. And they tasted sweet, just like she'd imagined they would. He slid his hand to her neck as their lips parted, and it sent a shiver down her spine. She let out a small moan in the back of her throat and he deepened the kiss, making her feel lightheaded with happiness and pleasure. As first kisses went, this one felt close to perfection, but it still had to end. He pressed another kiss to her cheek and the tip of her nose before resting his forehead against hers. Their breath mingled between them in the cold air and Jemma smiled as she put her hand on his chest to keep her balance.

In the background, someone started the countdown to midnight.

10.

"I think I'm in love with you Fitz," Jemma said against his lips, and she could feel them pull into a smile.

9.

"Good. Because I love you too!" A wide smile bloomed on her face as well.

8.

"How long have you known, Jemma?"

7.

"Probably last night. About ten minutes ago for certain. You?"

6.

"I don't know. I suppose I-"

5.

"Fitz!" she cut him off.

4.

"Last year. About fifteen minutes before midnight."

3.

"Oh Fitz!" She looked up at him. The moon was reflected in his eyes and he was the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen, but he still looked at her like she was the one who hung the moon and the stars. "You should have said something."

2.

"Well I just did," he said with a small grin.

1.

She captured his lips again and the kiss grew more passionate this time as she wound her arms around his neck. He pulled her closer and wrapped the blanket around her completely. Jemma laughed delightedly into the kiss as she threaded her fingers through his hair to finish making a complete mess of it.

In the background, fireworks exploded in beautiful colors in the clear sky above Glasgow and crowds could be heard cheering all through the neighborhood. Jemma and Fitz remained blissfully unaware of it all as they kept kissing to celebrate the end of a year and the beginning of a new chapter in their life.


End file.
